You Be Illin'

Ah, the good old days of the 1980s. Rap was still rap, and Run DMC was the king of the hill. Their album Raising Hell, set the platinum standard by which all future rap records would be judged.

So what does any of this have to do with Kim Jong Il and the North Koreans? Everything and nothing. Besides finding a neat little title for this posting, there are other tie ins.

Consider that L'il Kim is busy raising hell by launching missile after missile, and now threatens to launch even more. As if the first series of launches weren't enough of a failure. It's tricky after all to get missiles to operate properly. The North Koreans clearly haven't figured out how to launch with perfection.

All the same, L'il Kim thinks he's the son of Byford even though he wasn't born in Hollis. With his huge movie collection and wine collection, he lives in splendor while his country suffers to no end. And the sad fact is that there are few options on how to deal with the nutcase in Pyongnang. However, there is one thing to keep in mind. L'il Kim craves attention and he's doing everything within his power to get world attention back on him and his crazy hairdo that not even a dumb girl would go out into public wearing.

To many experts, the missile tests fit into a pattern: whenever Mr. Kim has concluded that he was not getting attention to his demands, he has staged a crisis. His father, Kim Il Sung, did so in 1994, and won an agreement from the Clinton administration that later fell apart. Kim Jong Il did so in 2003, as American troops were flowing toward Iraq, when North Korea threw out international inspectors and reprocessed the 8,000 spent nuclear fuel rods into what the Central Intelligence Agency says is enough bomb-grade material for six or more weapons.

So L'il Kim keeps tapping on the microphone wondering is it live, just to get more attention. Well, he's got the attention. Hope he likes living in the spotlight, because if we really want to shine a spotlight on his country, it wouldn't be pretty.

You couldn't walk around his country openly, walk this way or that, and you certainly couldn't wear my Addidas out and about because the average North Korean doesn't earn enough in a month to buy a pair, and have food to eat. Actually, most North Koreans don't have enough to eat on a regular basis, which explains why most of the cities are empty this time of year as they're all out in the fields trying to harvest the meager crops.

Daniel Drezner examines whether you should be worried about North Korea's missile launches. Considering their failures, the answer for now should be a cautious no.

However, the North continues to find new and unusual ways to get itself into trouble, including counterfeiting US currency. And this comes at a time when some in Congress are calling for more negotiations with the North? Sorry, but the North is purposefully undermining the US currency by introducing the supernotes.

Where are the Star Wars critics now, considering that the North Koreans are continuing to attempt missile launches to demonstrate their own capacity to attack the US and our allies in the region. Funny, but those critics are largely silent now that the program's necessity is unquestioned.

Others commenting on North Korea include: Austin Bay, Ed Morrissey, and The Jawa Report.

UPDATE:
This is an interesting take on the North Korean missile launches, failures, and ongoing threats:

For starters, North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il looks foolish - his top o' the line intercontinental ballistic missile, the Taepodong-2, went pfhhtttt! splash! after flying only 40 seconds. (Believe you me, someone is going to be spending serious time cooling their heels in a North Korean political prison camp after making the "Dear Leader's" fireworks look like sparklers . . . )

Moreover, the launch, coming after weeks of threats and demands, will lead to broad international condemnation and further political/economic isolation for North Korea. That will include more economic sanctions - something that its crippled economy and suffering people can ill afford.

And the Taepodong-2 failure (after a seven-year, self-imposed moratorium on ballistic-missile launches) makes Pyongyang look quite impotent as a long-range nuclear threat to the United States, significantly undermining its periodic bouts of brinksmanship.

The other bad news for Pyongyang is that the missile malfunction will make other potential buyers (most importantly Iran) think twice about adding the North Korean ICBM to their arsenals. (Obviously, this is great news for us.)

North Korea's hapless missile salvo also alienated its biggest benefactors, most notably China and South Korea. The blatant disregard for the wishes of neighboring Beijing and Seoul to not unsettle things is likely to bring real pain for Pyongyang.

Far from being the success he hoped for, the failed missile launches may further undermine L'il Kim's ability to deal on the international arms market and cause further erosion in support from China and South Korea. However, the North Korean gulag archipelago may see an influx of new members as those responsible for the failures will make their way to get reeducated on what happens to those who fail L'il Kim.

UPDATE:
Others blogging the North Korean missile mess: The Moderate Voice has an interesting take on bad choices and worse choices; The Poltiburo Diktat wonders whether Reagan was vindicated in pursuing Star Wars; Blue Crab Boulevard notes that Hugo Chavez is heading to North Korea for a little tet-a-tet (and maybe hair care tips?); AJ Strata sees the danger in the craziness; Iowa Voice notes the North's at it again; and Liberty and Justice notes that the North's intent on launching short range missiles this time - (if that fails, then we start launching midgets?)

Pamela notes that there's pretty wide support for taking action against North Korea - but the problem is that there are two countries who can put the kibosh on any action whatsoever - China and Russia, and both are standing in the way. The North Korea crisis is actually bringing the US and Japan closer together.

UPDATE:
Scrappleface warns that the North Koreans face a timeout from the UN by launching an attack against the Sea of Japan.